Orla Stanford’s poem explores the role of power in sex, and the experience of innocence lost.

Hey little Catholic girl have you had sex yet?
Yes on the sink with my legs stretched high above my head.
Was God watching me then,
Is he watching me now,
How many Hail Mary’s must I recite,
Tell me when can I feel clean at night.

Did he love me, like me, or simply desire the striking girl with the knowing smile
Sex will happen,
He will enjoy,
I will oblige.

Am I tainted, soiled, have I lost my new born shine,
Did he look my in the eye,
Could he sense my need to cry

Could he feel like I the separation from,
Body and Mind
Him to me,
Women and God,
Evidently not as he entered from behind,
And saw only my back,
Completely detached.
He came, 8 times in all,
And I’m still waiting to feel vaguely enthralled.

Illustrated by Aniqah Rawat.