Which Scandalous Lady are You?

Take Clara Heffernan’s quiz to determine which iconic scandalous lady you are!
For Issue #19 ‘Secrets’.

How would you describe your style?

A: bold colours, textures and prints
B: goth-grunge chic
C: sophisticated suits and sharp tailoring

What is most important to you?

A: family
B: community
C: true love

What is your dream job?

A: singer/musician
B: actor
C: socialite/ influencer

What’s your type?

A: tall, dark and handsome
B: young Johnny Depp or Leo Dicaprio vibes
C: private school posh boys

How should you deal with a scandal?

A: never complain, never explain
B: take a career hiatus
C: escape to your hometown for a while

What’s your movie night pick?

A: an A24 film that’s creative, cool and avant-garde
B: anything by Tim Burton
C: ‘The Wizard of Oz’, ‘Gone With The Wind’… all the classics!

Mostly A’s: Solange

When it comes to a scandal, you know to keep it behind closed (elevator) doors. No one necessarily knows why your family fracas occured, and you would never dignify the public with a response. All that seems apparent is that you’re a ride-or-die for your sister, and won’t stand for any nonsense from her no-good husband. In the words of Queen B, ‘Of course sometimes shit go down when it’s a billion dollars on an elevator’.

Mostly B’s: Winona Ryder

The Hollywood Starlet of the 90’s! You lived a wild life, and sometimes stealing $5,500 worth of clothes from Saks Fifth Avenue is the only thing left to tick off the list. Sure, you flirted with the rock-and-roll lifestyle of drugs, vandalism and grand theft, but after a comeback performance in ‘Stranger Things’, you’re nothing short of a phoenix from the ashes, flying back into the hearts of the nation.

Mostly C’s: Wallis Simpson

The OG scandalous lady; the mistress of misconduct; the powerhouse of impropriety; you walked so Meghan Markle could run, and we thank you for it. Sure, the British public may still have their hang ups about you, but after risking it all for love, I’m sure you couldn’t care less. While the tabloid papers loved to loathe you, we admire the tenacity it took to rock the monarchy to its core, all for the sake of romance. 

Illustration by Rivka Cocker.

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